The blog has been dead for quite a while. That 30 day thing just wasn't my cup of tea.

Currently thinking of a series, or topics to write about. Wanna keep this thing going.

30 Day Challenge : Day 18

Day 18: Your beliefs

This is such a general topic. A man's belief encompasses a lot of things. But I'll try to break it down.

Life:
Life isn't fair.
Our responses to events in life determines the outcomes that we face.
Not everyone will be successful in life.
Everyone can be happy.
Guys and girls can never be best friends without them eventually being a couple.

Religion:
Jesus Christ is the messiah prophesied to be the saviour of humanity.
Not all religions are the same.

Love:
There's no such thing as "the one" for you. Everyday is a challenge to be "the one".
Love is not complete without sacrifice.

Meh this is tiring. Can't think no more.

30 Day Challenge: Day 17

Day 17: Your highs and lows of the past year.

2010 was a good year I guess. It feels like so long ago, and yet at the same time just yesterday.

It's hard to identify the highs and lows for me, as everything just seemed so... blah? Like if highs were to be the positive side of the graph and lows the negatives, it feels like I constantly lied on the x axis. Maybe it's because the highs and lows average out to zero. I don't know.

Highs:
I graduated.
I tried out weird hairstyles.
I had very fun housemates.
I enjoyed OCF.
I drank a fair bit.

Lows:
I feel like I didn't really achieve much.

Damn. 2010. You make a very boring blog post. Then again, maybe I'm not trying hard enough to remember. Blame it on the al-al-al-al-alcohol...

30 Day Challenge: Day 16

Day 16: Your views on mainstream music

Mainstream music, don't like it, don't hate it.

Some songs are great. I kinda like Britney Spears. SERIOUSLY.

Mainstream music, what I don't like about it is that it feels so over-thought, over-manufactured, like these songs were written solely for monetary returns and not for the expression of oneself and the letting go of one's emotion. The music becomes dishonest, fake, insincere. The words have no meaning. The music is still catchy, but there's no feel there.

That said, I still listen to mainstream music on the radio when I drive. And I think Britney Spear songs are a gift from God.

30 Day Challenge: Day 15

Day 15: Your favourite Tumblrs

Don't really use Tumblr nor do I check out Tumblrs.

mine: http://magmachilli.tumblr.com/
some person's: http://showmepictures.tumblr.com/

30 Day Challenge: Day 13

Day 13: Your earliest memory.

OK I don't know how old I was then. I'll need to ask my mom. I'm not even sure if this memory is a true memory or a recreation of said memory formed unconsciously. Maybe someone implanted it in my mind, like Inception.

I probably was 4 or 5. My dad, mom, I as well as JonC and his dad and mom travelled to New Zealand. JonC was still just a baby I reckon. Anyway, so yeah we went to NZ to visit my aunt and uncle who migrated to NZ.

Now on that trip I remember that I was pushed into some pond of water or something by this girl who was ( I guess she still is) older than me. So I was drowning or something. And I can remember the feeling I had. I was very worried that I swallowed a gold fish or something...

Now that it's so long ago, I don't know how true this memory is to the actual events. Signs of age I guess.

30 Day Challenge: Day 13

Day 13: Somewhere you'd like to move or visit

I'd really like to visit... Europe in general? I'd really like to do a Eurotrip.

What I'd like to do on said Eurotrip.
Drink lots of beer.
Take lots of pictures.
Eat lots of pizza.
Drink more beer.
Immerse myself in culture like some douchey "I'm soooo sophisticated" dickhead.
Take a couple more pictures.
Drink more beer.

Probably should wait till the them countries that have debt problems to to fail. Make me ringgits go further... Pity. They like brothers who have their chicks swipe their credit cards raw...

30 Day Challenge: Day 12

Day 12: Bullet your whole day

7ish wake up, wash up, dress up
7.45 leave house
8.10 reach ss15 parked in front of bank an paid parking
8.15 had breakfast with Lina. Had a roti kosong and a Milo panas.
8.45 got into branch. Signed in stating time as 8.36 or something. Chilled around.
9.10 started working as a greeter. Jon came in for a bank draft. Saw Ani or however you spell her name.
1.50 went fo lunch at Benta Kaya with Lina. Had Hakka mee, green tea with lemon and vanilla ice-cream. Witnessed this driver who went turning into a the road knocked a motorcyclist. No biggie. In her shock she reversed and backended into a Saga back right door. Shit happens. Insert cliche lady driver comment.
2.10 returned to branch. Worked as greeter again.
4 met Madam So to get manual and form signed. Said goodbye to the staff down at ss15 branch.
4.15 helped get a banne mr hung up fo fathers day.
4.45 signed out and left maybank. Called Ian and Zi Yang to confirm if dinner is on. It's not. Called Sean to arrange meet up.
5Ish Starbucks. Ordered a mocha and started surfing.
6.42 finishing up this blog post while waiting for Sean.
6.43 this post is done

30 Day Challenge: Day 11

Day 11: Put your iPod on shuffle and write down the first 10 songs that pop up

Iron Maiden - Run To The Hills
Atreyu - Right Side Of The Bed
Alexisonfire - Drunks, Lovers, Sinners and Saints
Childish Gambino - Put It In My Video
Childish Gambino - Let Me Dope You
Paramore - Here We Go Again
Unearth - Letting Go
Protest The Hero - The Reign Of Unending Terror
Manchester Orchestra - I Can Feel A Hot One
Scar Symmetry - Dominion

I download by albums. So there are songs that I don't really listen to.

30 Day Challenge: Day 10

Day 10: Discuss your first love and first kiss.

30 Day Challenge: Day 09

Day 09: How you hope your future will be like?

Like a Snoop Dogg music video. I'd like to have the chick(s), the cars, the good life.

In all seriousness, I hope I'd be financially successful, have a loving wife, have a nice car, have a nice house, kids maybe.

But hey, that's what I'd hope it'll be like. But life really loves giving out lemons. And I'm perfectly fine with the future not turning out the way I'd like it to be. I've been bracing myself for the shit to hit the ceiling all my life.

30 Day Challenge: Day 08

Day 08: A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.

This very moment? I don't know really. In a way, I'm never really satisfied with the way things are. If you know me, I can always come up with something to criticize, or I can always find something wrong with everything. So yeah, there will always be something in life that I would be able to think of that I would like to change or improve, if that sentence makes any sense. Forgive me it's time to sleep.

However I am content with the way things are. Pretty much living in the moment now, enjoying things as they come and go. I also can find assurance in God, which is a huge plus. So yeah. Every moment seems like the most satisfying moment in life.

That and when you've been holding in your pee for like hours and you can finally pee? That is a damn satisfying feeling. lol.

30 Day Challege: Day 07

To view the first post which contains the whole list for the 30 Day Challenge, click here.

Day 07: Your zodiac sign and if it fits your personality.

3 letters: WTF. Personally I don't believe in zodiacs. It would mean that people who are born during a certain time period all have the same characteristics and features. That just doesn't make sense to me.

And I can't say no judgment on those who believe in this because I really believe this is utter bull, and I am aware that some of my friends do believe in this. I still love y'all. It's just that this just doesn't make sense to me.

30 Days Challenge: Day 04

To view the first post which contains the whole list for the 30 Day Challenge, click here.

Day 04: Your views on religion

That's a very broad question isn't it? I have A LOT of views when it comes to religion, especially my own. But let's talk general stuff.

Me, being a Christian, think the my religion is the only way to go. lol. It's a very closed minded POV, but that's just how I see it. I personally don't agree with those people who say all religions are the same. I do agree that most of the major religions encourage proper and moral living, and are beneficial to society. The general principles and building blocks are the same. If you take the major religions are compare them side by side, you'd find that there are many similarities, many identical elements.

However I still think Christianity is a little different. I'd prefer not you say it here. If you want to know, just ask me personally.

30 Days Challenge: Day 05

To view the first post which contains the whole list for the 30 Day Challenge, click here.

Day 05: A time you've thought of ending your life.

I've never really felt depressed or emo to the point where I'd kill myself. However I've:

1. When up high looking down, I imagine what it'll be like if I were to jump. How fast I'd fall, how hard I'd hit the floor.
2. When I hold a knife, I wonder what it'd feel like if I cut myself, or stab myself. I wonder if it would hurt, how much blood will spurt out.

Otherwise, I generally don't think about suicide.

30 Day Challege: Day 03

To view the first post which contains the whole list for the 30 Day Challenge, click here.

Day 03: Your views on drugs and alcohol.

First off, I'd like to state it off the bat that I have never smoked and never done drugs though I openly wished that I had at least have given weed a try while I was still in uni. I do however drink the occasional drink. I enjoy beer, especially Stella Artois, and I enjoy moscato, especially Brown Brothers Moscato. I think wine goes well with food, and I think tequila is really fun. Vodka's okay, love rum because of mojitos. I plan to take up scotch, cause it's stuck up poncy rich people alcohol.

Now my views on drugs first. Drugs, I've been led to believe, are bad for you. When I say drugs, I assume we're not talking about the products that are being produced by big pharmaceutical companies like Pfizer and the like. Drugs like marijuana, ecstasy, cocaine, those seem to be bad lifestyle choices that have severe effects on health, career and relationships. So drugs for me are a no go. Even cigarettes, I won't smoke em cause they're bad for your health and while it's cool and I sincerely think that they are very good social tools, they're not for me.

Alcohol, apparently is carcinogenic and bad for health too. Associated with various liver and kidney diseases, I've been trying to cut down on my consumption. I can't really drink that much anymore. Not that I could ever drink a lot.

So drugs and alcohol, generally bad. But no judgment on those who chose to consume such products. We're all entitled to choose what we want to do with our lives and money.

30 Days Challenge: Day 02

Day 02: Where would you like to be in 10 years?

10 years is quite a long time. It is a little over 45% of my current life. It's like I have to increase my net worth, or add 45% more value to my self. That's quite a lot to think about.

I could try to add value to myself in terms of financial standing. A good job, preferably in a nice bank, an Investment Bank, doing equity research maybe? I don't know. In terms of career, I've just started working, so it all depends on what I find to be my strengths. I'm still getting to know myself. It could be in the assets I have. If I had a choice, I'd like to have a Imprezza, or maybe a Golf GTI by the time I'm 32. Wishful thinking. I'd also like to have owned some property by then. Hmmm.

Or I could try to add value to myself by being a family guy? In 10 years, I'd like to have found the right girl, settled down or maybe be at a stage where I'm prepared to settle down, start a family maybe. But hey, I'm already 22 and I've never been in a relationship. So looks like I already have a bad start.( some might say I don't even have one)

So we've discussed about love and romance and come to the conclusion that my aspirations are anything but close to reality. So what have I got to hope for?

I can only put faith and hope in this: to grow closer and closer to God throughout these 10 years. Corny as it may be, I personally feel that there's nothing more assuring than God's love. I might not have the money, the cars, the woma(e)n, but I have the assurance that God has a plan for me, not for my own insignificant aspirations and dreams, but for His will and purposes.

Sides, I don't know what's gonna happen in these coming 10 years. God knows, I don't. So come whatever may.

Preachy lol.

30 Day Challenge: Day 01

Was asked by my dear friend Eileen to do this, but put it off as I was a little preoccupied. But I have the time now, so how about I give it a go, so that this blog doesn't seem so dead.

Day 1: Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.

Single life, in a word, is easy. There's a bit of air in every step I take, a slight skip. Things are easier this way, without the need to care as much.

Of course, if the right girl were to show up, then I'd work towards that. But right now, I'm enjoying life as it is.

http://omgshesaidwhat.wordpress.com/

New blog for rants and what not, and so I can keep magmachilli pg13.

Gold Coast 2010.2 Currumbin + Other randoms?

The rest of the pics, are like just rojak pics that I took. Like I said, I didn't take pics diligently.

Continuing on, Currumbin Wildlife Sanctuary

In case you've never seen one ever in your whole entire life, this is a koala on a tree. By the way, has anyone told you that you need to get out more often?

Gold Coast Trip 2010.1: Brisbane

Warning: Don't camwhore in public or risk getting caught.

Last summer, I had the opportunity to chill and take a break up North at the Gold Coast, way before the state went underwater.

Melaka 2011

Way overdue...



The Melaka Trip is one that was really needed on my part. It's been a while since we've hung out, and it was a trip where I decided on certain things, which turned out inconsequential. But all in all, I really enjoyed myself.

More pictures after the jump.

Getting over Rachel

Disclaimer: This is gonna be long, emo-ish, Christian-ish. But I hope this will benefit you in some way.

Who is your Rachel? If you know me, I think you should know who was my Rachel.

Jacob, a character in the Bible, was running for his life cause his brother was trying to kill him, so he ran to his Uncle Laban. Now Uncle Laban had 2 daughters, Leah who probably was a 1 or a 2, and Rachel who was the bees knees or something. Now Jacob had the hots for Rachel, and so when his Uncle wanted to give him a promotion, he requested that he'll work for 7 years and his paycheck increase be Rachel. Uncle Laban, sneaky bastard, said it's better that if I marry her off to you compared to someone else. And apparently 7 years is like totally ridiculous by the standards of those days, and Jacob being swayed by love, totally got ripped off. And the worst part is that after the 7 years, Jacob who thought he was gonna get the girl in the end, got Leah. And after that, he had to work for another 7 years for Rachel.

Reading Counterfeit Gods by Timothy Keller, I have come to realize that she was definitely an idol that I have placed in my life. Looking back, I can see that my thoughts, my actions, my plans all somewhat reflected my desire to be with her. Instead of God being the first motivation in my life, instead of being the first one I think of when I were to decide what steps to take, it was her. She became my God. I was starting to feel that, if I did end up with her, life would be so much better. Life would automatically get straight. And while there's nothing particularly wrong about desiring the relationship itself, what made it wrong was that I tried to fill that emptiness in me or find justification(or approval if it makes more sense) with romantic love when God has really given all the love that I really need. Clearly I have self confidence issues. My priorities were warped, my judgment seriously clouded. God was no longer my first love.

While I think that there wasn't seriously wrong with me having feelings for her, I definitely did not handle the situation right. And it goes to show that God knows what is best. Given how I was so obsessed with it, I definitely wouldn't not have been a good partner, probably controlling and constantly feeling threatened, and it wouldn't not have worked and things would have become sour.

But that's assuming that I even had a chance. And in my human nature, I still question, did I really? Could I have done anything different? What could I have done to sweep her off her feet? But alas, what good is that for me now?

In my weakness, I'm still finding it hard to let go and move on. I still feel like we're good for each other. I still wonder what I could have done to make it work. But at the end of the day I can only pray that God will continue to lead my steps, move my legs, carry me when I can't walk anymore, and hopefully I'll end up where He wants me to be.

Here's to moving on. Carpe Diem.