Post- Results Reflections

Initially I did not intend to check my results until I got back to Canberra, where I can sit down with a beer in front of my com and brace myself for what is to come.

The results aren't just results. They are an indication of what is to come. They are but the beginning of what would be defined as the rest of my life. And that is scary.

That said, in the end I did. They were okay. Not THAT bad, though I probably could have done better, but I'm thankful that God saw me through. Everything I have, I credit to God. By my own strength, I can but achieve nothing. To those who go by without depending on God, good on you I guess, but I know it is impossible for me.

Anyway enough of the Christian rant. There's probably more to come anyway.

The future seems so uncertain. Graduating with a Actuarial and Finance degree, I must say that I'm not stoked about getting a job. What are my future prospects? A job in an Insurance firm? While I do see the merit of insurance because of the law of large numbers, the industry itself feels too much of a con job. Finance? Feels too much like betting to me ( I know I know it isn't. But I'm the type of person who would rather much invest in a physical asset rather than a piece of paper. In saying that I probably missing the point of finance or generalising. But whatever.) And the corporate world, just seems to much of a monster. A beast whose birth is from the greed and evil of humans as a collective. And me, an anti conformist at heart, how can I live with myself being just another gear that helps turns the hands of such a beast, or the oil that lubricates the wheels of this beast, helping it move forward and grow bigger. Gah. I probably couldn't look at myself in the mirror without hating myself.

And in saying that, I really feel jealous about those people who seem to have it just right with their life, getting the grades that they need (and I'm sure they deserve them), know where their life is headed, have certainty in what the future entails, and looking forward to it. Lucky buggers.

At the end of this post, I'm sure you'd come to the conclusion that I am some spoilt brat who just hasn't grown up, hasn't awoken to the realities of this world, and has to let go of his ideals and just do what it takes to feed myself and put food on my imaginary table to feed my future imaginary family ( There'll be a table and seated are a bunch of stuffed teddy bears. *shudder* I hope I don't become like them freaks who talk to toys and other inanimate objects)

But here I say this: I don't intend to live a life which just fulfills the expectations of the world, or meets the needs of my life. I think it is more worthwhile to live for something bigger, something greater, something of more value and meaning. *Christian-y alert* Turn away if you don't like religious talk. You've been warned. Now that's what being a Christian is about. In realisation of what God and Jesus has done for you, to live a life that reflects God's love. A life that is not lived for self, but in thankfulness and recognition, a life that is for God's will and his people. A life that is not my own, but His now. That is what being a Christian should be. It may sound lofty, unrealistic, and even unattainable, but that is what I shall resolve to do.

Living for Him and His purposes, constantly seeking to do everything for His glory.

Now I wonder, and probably can conclude that I probably failed to do just that through out my undergrad degree.

Let's hope I can do that from now. Whatever that means...

It's been a while since I've updated. Hmmm.

Gordon Ramsay Voiceover:
2 hours of tossing and turning in bed. 1 can of Monster. 4 Freddos. Half a Kit Kat bar. A whole lot of trying to study. A whole little of actually getting any study done. 6 hours of exam, done.

Last day of my Undergraduate Career.

Yashica Electro 35 GSN

New toy! Got it cheap-ish. Condition isn't great. Viewfinder window glass is cracked, there's a dent in the filter ring. I tried to bend it back, but I think I just made it worse.

2 months till Christmas!

" Your hair sure grows fast enough."

Nope. Not fast enough.

Testing again.

Testing. Will twitterfeed work?

There's something about film that gives it that vintage-y feel.

I had the worse brunch ever. Oats. Cooked in a microwave. Was like eating cardboard paste.

I really feel like cycling.

Imperial Brand Clothing: King

Just fixed my pair of jeans, again.

Got them in 2008 on a trip to Melbourne. The whole process in purchasing them were an adventure in itself. Walking to Fitzroy, which felt like a totally different side to Melbourne, finding All Of The Above which was a really cool store. So long ago.

I think this pair has fixes all over the place. I have a big hole in the left back pocket, a crotch rip which I so dodgy-ly got repaired in SS14, the store next to the Nasi Lemak Fried Chicken/ Wan Tan Mee joint I frequent when I'm back, few holes at the back which I stitched up, and now I guess because the rivet broke, cause I was too fat, this had to happen eventually. I kinda feel proud of my fix though, nice black and blue.

I wouldn't say this is the coolest pair of jeans, cause it isn't. And it's not like it has the best fit or the best fades or whatever. But this is my pair of jeans. And it's part of my story.

But I think it's probably time I get a new pair.

Videos for the discerning eye.

Click the image. It's a link to a website. It's Youtube, after a haircut, a good shave, with a nice Armani suit on. It's basically Youtube and Vimeo videos, hand picked apparently . The interface is nice and clean. And most of the videos are REALLY of good quality, in terms of image quality and content.


And this video is really nice. The Wayfarers and bad girl spunk is cool imo.


And this video is really interesting. Such a cool store, and kudos for small business owners! Power to the people.

Floriade 2010

My attempt at videos. Was frustrating working with iMovie. Output quality is really bad imo. Video is not sharp. Oh well.

Taken on Saturday. Was quite a chilled and relaxed event.

4 for 4.

Parkway Drive Deep Blue Tour

2 concerts in 2 weeks. Man, my studies are being neglected. I have an assignment due in 2 weeks. I'm way behind my work and at this rate, I'm not gonna be ready for my finals. Oh well.

Parkway Drive Deep Blue Tour, Royal Theater National Convention Centre, Canberra, 25 September 2010.

Went alone, since I don't know anyone who is into any of the bands. Bought some merch. Got in the hall. Tried to find a nice spot. There were a lot of kids. I would peg them as being around 15-17. They looked pretty bad. After the concert, I saw many of them smoking outside the building, like it's no biggie. I guess it isn't for them. You see kids walking around with smokes here in Australia. Anyway I felt a little intimidated by the crowd. Felt very out of place.

Anyway I managed to find a spot, one or 2 people behind the barrier on the righter side of the stage.

The lineup for the night was: 50 Lions, The Ghost Inside, The Devil Wears Prada, Parkway Drive.

First up was the 50 Lions. Hardcore band. They're ok. I kinda liked their Self Titled 7" but their set was kinda forgetable.

Frontman Jonathan Vigil

Guitarist Aaron Brooks

Next was The Ghost Inside. They set up their own gear, which I thought was quite humble and respectable. They opened with "Unspoken" which is a song I quite like. Other songs which I remember on the top of my head was "Faith or Forgiveness" and "Chrono". They weren't as popular among the crowd, but was cool that some of the crowd knew the words. The guitarist Aaron Brooks kinda looked like Owen from Grey's Anatomy. All in all, a good set, felt a bit short though.

The Devil Wears Prada.


Guitarist Jeremy DePoyster singing the girly part clean vocals.

After The Ghost Inside were The Devil Wears Prada. There were girls standing in front of me and they were like mad crazy. They were like shouting and screaming, and reaching out to the stage when guitarist Jeremy DePoyster and bassist Andy Trick got to the right side of the stage. DWP was more interactive with the crowd as compared to TGI. Guitarist Jeremy DePoyster shouted something and pointed at the girls in front of me, and Keys James Baney climbed onto the barricade and reached out to the fans. Songs played were "Danger: Wildman", " Assistant To The Regional Manager" and "Outnumbered" just to name a few. Mike Hranica was wild screaming out throughout the set, not lacking in energy and enthusiasm. All in all, good show, but fangirl-ism was a bit annoying. Oh and they also said how they're Christians and they're there doing what they do because of Jesus, which was kinda cool, I guess. Didn't really see the point though as I don't know what that would achieve. Oh well, props for their faith and openess.

This is where I sat.


Parkway Drive


The sea of people.

Last band to play were Parkway Drive. By then, being a short Asian, I decided to move back to the seats and just chill and watch the show from the back. The hall is split into 2, with the floor standing area in the front, and a seperate elevated seating area. Asshole bouncer didn't let me go through, when there were like so many other people sitting in the seated area. But got a nice tip from a friendly dude, I just had to just use another entrance which was not guarded. Thank you random dude. Anyway Thank God I did get to the seats. When PWD played, the crowd just turned into animals. Circle pits. Wall of death. I wouldn't have made it out in one piece. Parkway Drive definitely have a God-like status here in Australia, and I guess Aussies have a lot of pride for their home-grown culture. The PWD set was pretty cool, with fake coconut trees on stage and weird guy with jew-fro crowd surfing on a inflatable boat and mosh camera attached on helmet. Towards the end of the set, the jew-fro clown mooned to crowd. Dispense of free merch by making the crowd scramble for a AFL ball as they did the Wall. Making them reach for free tee by dangling a it from a fishing line. The sea of people jumping up and down like a rough night with waves crashing and water churning. It was wild. PWD played a good mix of oldies and new ones, "Idols and Anchors", "Sleepwalker", "Unrest", "Smoke'em If You've Got'em", "Carrion".

Was tempted to get a PWD shirt that said "What The Fuck Have I Become", a line from their new song "Unrest" but thought it not wise. Instead I got a DWP tee instead.

All in all a good night.

Oh and Matt, if you're reading this, got you a white DWP tee. You like white right

When one doesn't want to study, one makes a Gundam.



And watches really cool videos on the Youtube.

World Magnetic 2010 Sydney

Metallica Sydney Acer Arena 18th September 2010

[Can't Get The Pics Uploaded. Annoying.]

Had the privilege to go see Metallica, one of the Big Four Bay Area Thrash Metal Legends. Opening bands were The Sword which existence I never knew of and Fear Factory, a very influential band and a legend in it's own right.

Doors opened very early and The Sword came on at 7-ish, played probably around 5 songs. Fear Factory followed suit, playing around 7 to 8 songs. I have never really listened to Fear Factory prior to this concert, but they were good. Heavy ala chug-chug power chords and noodly riffs coupled with blast beats would make any metal aficionado move his or her head in a up-down fashion, how can one complain? Don't really remember the titles of the songs, but from the top of my head, they played "Self Bias Indicator", "Fear Campaign" "Powershifter".

When Fear Factory finished their set, the engineers got busy for about half and hour, the lights went dark, and Acer Arena came to life.

Metallica's set started out with "This Was Your Life". Twas rather amusing as well as dramatic, with the whole stadium in darkness and James Hetfield singing the verse under the spotlight, and finishing, light goes off only to reappear at another random spot on the stage continuing the next verse or chorus. Stellar opening with laser beaming all across the stage from 4 monolithic coffins dangling from the ceiling.

For the next one and a half hours, Metallica made it evident that they are one of the best Metal bands ever, playing a few songs from their latest album, but more importantly not forgetting to play their classics. The set list in chronological order for the night:

1. This Was Your Life
2. End Of The Line
3. Fuel
4. Fade To Black
5. Broken Beat Scarred
6. The Four Horsemen
7. Sad But True ( I can't believe I didn't know this song, after listening to Black Album countless times but manage to mishear this as Take Control. Ironically, it's sad but true. Clearly I'm not a very good fan. In my defense I listen more to the guitars than the lyrics.)
8. Sanitarium
9. All Nightmare Long
10. One
11. Master Of Puppets
12.Fight Fire With Fire
13. Nothing Else Matters
14. Enter Sandman
15. Breadfan (Would have prefered if they did Am I Evil by King Diamond like they did in Melbourne)
16. Hit The Lights
17. Seek And Destroy

There were a few odd moments throughout the night. James Hetfield can say very weird things. "Do you life the new album? You better..." and "You make us feel good" were just a few to mention. And throughout the night, Lars Ulrich acted like a drummer who was all too hungry for recognition (Just my honest opinion. A drummer should just stay behind the drums until the set is done.) There was also flames going up all over the stage with it's warmth reaching me all the way up on the Upper Concourse, which is apt for "Fuel". And black balls dropped from the top for the closing song "Seek and Destroy", causing chaos off and especially on the stage, with these black balls knocking off mics and hitting equipment causing the roadies to hustle around try to prevent destruction of equipment. Clearly they didn't think that one through.

It was a good long night. And got too see Kirk Hammett play live, on his pretty ESPs. Shame that I couldn't be on the floor, and I guess I should have learned up more lyrics, but I'm thankful that I've manage to check them out live. I confess I'm not he most metal of fans, heck I don't even have my long hair anymore,but Metallica was one of the first bands I listened to and led to my preference for music with a heavier flavour and for that I'm in debt.

Thanks to Aron for asking me to go along.

See, you can win the rat race
But you're still
Nothing but a fucking rat.

Parkway Drive - Unrest
Deep Blue (2010)

To go for Deep Blue tour or not. Hmmm. Parkway Drive, seen them twice now. But The Devil Wears Prada and The Ghost Inside and 50 Lions. Tempting.

Wish I had people who want to go. Maybe I should just buy 2 extra tickets and guilt trip people into going. Or maybe I just need new friends. Hmmm.

Selamat Menyambut Hari Kebangsaan ke-53 y'all.

Just so that my video doesn't remain on the top, here's a picture from the backyard.

This WAS my hair. It's gone now. Kinda regret shaving it all off. Oh well. Time to grow my long hair again.

Interesting.

Taken from here. It's interesting to see how these people even take an interest in the sham and embarressment that is Malaysian politics. Somehow the grammar of the previous sentence seems off. Oh well. Read. I pasted it just in case you need to pay to read the WSJ.

For Dr M's response, click here. Sarcasm included. Do read the comments too. It's rather entertaining.

Malaysia's Opposition on Trial

Anwar Ibrahim could be headed to prison again on trumped up charges. We urge the U.S. government to speak out on his behalf.

By AL GORE AND PAUL WOLFOWITZ

We come from opposite sides of the political spectrum and disagree about a great many things. However, one issue that brings us together is the case of Anwar Ibrahim, the former deputy prime minister of Malaysia who is now leader of the political opposition in that country.

Mr. Anwar has been charged under very dubious circumstances with sodomy, a criminal offense under Malaysian law. If convicted, he faces a possible 20-year sentence—effectively life in prison for a man of 63. His trial, scheduled to resume next week, threatens not just Mr. Anwar but all those in Malaysia who have struggled for a freer and more democratic nation. It is also important for the rest of the world, because it casts a troubling shadow over the future of a nation that should be a model for other Muslim countries.


Our views of Anwar Ibrahim have been formed completely independently of each other. We do not always agree with his views on foreign policy, but we do agree that as a political leader, statesman and intellectual, Mr. Anwar possesses qualities that encourage hope for the future. These qualities include lucidity and openness to debate and engagement; commitment to principles of accountability and good governance; and a serious concern for the future of his country and the world—not to mention his extraordinary courage in standing up for what he believes. We are convinced that he is committed to the values of pluralism, tolerance and freedom that are needed for Malaysia to flourish.

In the end, what matters is not our opinion of Mr. Anwar's character, but the opinion of his fellow countrymen. Malaysians should decide for themselves, through an open electoral process, who they wish to lead them. They should not be deprived of that opportunity by an abuse of judicial power.

This is the second time that Mr. Anwar has been subjected to a politically‑motivated trial on similar charges. The first time was in 1998, when as deputy prime minister and finance minister he dared to mount a challenge to then Prime Minister Mahathir Mohamed. Mr. Anwar was jailed, beaten severely, and condemned to years of solitary confinement after a trial that was a travesty of justice. That is not just our conclusion. It is the conclusion of the International Commission of Jurists, the International Bar Association, and a number of international human-rights organizations. It was also the conclusion of Malaysia's highest court, which overturned the sodomy conviction in 2004, after Mr. Mahathir was no longer prime minister.

Mr. Anwar now leads the coalition of Malaysia's three opposition parties, which won more than a third of the seats in the parliamentary elections of March 2008. This was the best showing that the opposition had ever managed against the governing coalition led by the United Malays National Organization, the party that has ruled the country for the past 53 years.

Three months after the election, Mr. Anwar threatened to call for a vote of no confidence in Parliament and take over the government. He was then arrested and charged again with sodomy. Like the charges 10 years earlier, the timing of these new charges carries the strong odor of political manipulation. And, if anything, the case against Mr. Anwar this time is even less credible and the violations of due process are even more egregious.

While Anwar Ibrahim is on trial before the state, the state is on trial before its people and the world. If he were to be convicted, the whole of Malaysia's political life and its standing in the world would be damaged. And for what gain? The timing of the trial has led many observers to the conclusion that the objective is to stem the ruling party's loss of popular support. Public opinion polls indicate that the great majority of Malaysians see the charges against Mr. Anwar as politically motivated. In any event, as Mr. Anwar himself would be the first to say, his imprisonment would not extinguish his cause. On the contrary, the movement he began a decade ago will continue to spread.

This is a pivotal moment in Malaysia's history with consequences that are also meaningful on a global scale. With a population of nearly 30 million, Malaysia is not a small country. But it is also significant as an example of a Muslim-majority country making its way in the world. It has been able, over the first half-century of its independence, to demonstrate that it is possible to achieve economic growth while sustaining a degree of harmony among its religiously and ethnically diverse population.

In recent years, however, the country has been sliding backwards, with increasing exploitation of religious and ethnic differences for political purposes. The trial and conviction of Mr. Anwar would intensify these problems by destroying the confidence of millions of Malaysians in the possibility of justice under the law.

We urge our own government to make clear the importance the U.S. attaches to the role of the law in sustaining a political process in which justice and freedom are natural allies. We know from experience that sensitive issues of this kind are often best pursued quietly, government to government. But time is running out. A moment of truth is approaching.

Two days ago, a judge postponed Mr. Anwar's trial in order to deal with charges of an improper relationship between a female prosecutor and Mr. Anwar's accuser. This is an opportunity. Malaysia's system of governance has the capacity to do the right thing—not only for Anwar Ibrahim, but for the millions of Malaysian citizens who look to him as a spokesman for their aspirations. We urge those in the Malaysian government who will decide this matter to act with wisdom.

Mr. Gore was the 45th vice president of the United States. Mr. Wolfowitz was deputy secretary of defense from 2001 to 2005.

[WTS] Remington Travel 1800

lol.

Things to consider

1. What should I do next year?
2. Should I take a year off?
3. Do I want to do a Masters Of Finance, and where do I want to do it?
4. Do I want to do a Juris Doctor, and where do I want to do it?
5. Should I reconsider Actuarial? (Actually I rather not. I'm not good at it, and I find it boring.)
6. Should I be a bum.
7. Work?

Farewell 017 number.

NOOOOOOOOO!

I've been putting off reloading my Hotlink number and now it's gone! And I kinda liked the number. Dang.

Stop acting, start being.

Christian born n' raised.
There's a danger to it. Being exposed to all the cliches and bible school answers, we know em all. But it's sometimes scary how we assume a lot of things, or we says things like "somewhere in the Bible there's this part that says..." it's dangerous.

Philippians 4:13 I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

This in my opinion is a good example. This line is a common line in which Christians use to find strength and comfort when facing difficult situations. We tell ourselves that through Christ, we can do all things, we're unstoppable, [insert line that can be found from random motivational book]. But when read in context, this verse, in my humble opinion, is Paul giving recognition to Christ sustaining his ministry, financially and maybe spiritually as well. Paul doesn't say that he's Superman. He's just saying that Christ enables him in his ministry.

Another example. One cliche line that you always here people say is this:
'Suicide is an unforgivable sin.' Just in case people don't get it, when we mean unforgivable, it means instant one way ticket to hell, to a life of eternal suffering and damnation. Now look it up in your bibles people and you'd find that no where in the bible does it explicitly say that it's a eternal life in Hell if you take your own life. The only time the bible mentions an unforgivable sin is when some Pharisees blasphemed against the Holy Spirit. (Mark 3.29-30)

So really, what we know as Christians, our "Sunday school answers", how sure are we that they're correct? How sure are we that we're living in accordance to what is required of us in the Bible? How sure are we that our way of life is grounded on the teachings found in the Holy book?

I don't think I can speak for all Christians when I say this, but personally I've become a 'somewhere in the bible' Christian, and that pisses me off. It's so dangerous, especially if we don't check it out and it so happens we're wrong. It changes our whole understanding, distorts the message that God tries to convey through his word. We become complacent, not really taking the Bible seriously. It's about time we realise how important the Bible is, as it's the main way that God speaks to us.

I would say that there's a real danger with knowing all the 'sunday school answers'. We know what the right things to say, we know what are the right things to do. And we do say them, do them. We go through the motions of living a Christian life, do everything by the "book".

But are we living for Christ?

Excuse my lack of flair with words, I don't know where this is going anymore. To the point, what I'm trying to get to is this:

1. We need to stop acting like Christians and start being Christians.

2. We need to read the Bible properly.

1 Corinthians 11:14 lol

I've been contemplating shaving my head for quite a while. But I just can't bear to part with my long-ish hair. Well it's not that long now. I was initially thinking of keeping my hair long enough that I can tie it, but now? Hmm. Should I do it? Should I lose my emo-ness? Should I lose my ability to headbang? Do I look better with long hair or short hair? Help me decide!

And do comment or something so I can identify who you are and know what your opinion is.

Should Joshua shave his head?
	"Yes. Crew cut's the way to go. The shorter, the sexier."
	"No. Your long locks of hair is super hot."
	"Does it even matter? What's wrong with you. Get a life."
pollcode.com free polls

The ring is the thing.
Hope is the rope.
Pull until the house is full.

Worst semester over. Yay.

5 hours and 11 minutes to freedom.

Why did I do 3 level 3 courses this semester. Why didn't I choose an easier elective? WHY!

Cos I wasn't thinking.

Tattoo idea:
American gothic
Jia Gong and Jia Por.

21-1h57m
9

LMF - 揸緊中指 ( Liberty )

Veronica Mars, Penfolds Rawson's Retreat Shiraz Cabernet, 3 am.

An empty mind, an empty bottle, an empty life.

Maybe I should just tweet.

1down3togo

Weeds. Aptly put name. Addictive much. Getting in the way of my life. Makes time fly by. Leaves me feeling I wasted my whole day. Moving in slow motion.

Just so we're clear, I'm talking about the TV series.

Interesting note: In Canberra, possession of up to 25 grams, or five plants, is not a criminal offence but carries a $100 fine. So marijuana isn't exactly legal in Canberra, contrary to what people say here, but still, $100 fine ain't gonna stop anyone from lighting up.

Dang. I effed up another watch strap.

To those who own watches with leather straps:

1. Contrary to what you read on the internet, don't use vinegar. The internet says vinegar, and I used red wine vinegar. Maybe I should have used normal vinegar. I gave the watch a soak in the vinegar and left it to dry overnight but now it smells of vinegar.

2. I washed it after leaving it in the fridge for an hour to dry, and it still stank of vinegar, and decided to dry it on the stove. Part of it shrunk. And some liquid started to come out. And after that, it still smelt funny.

So yeah. Don't do what I did. Words of wisdom.

I really hate not having a watch on my hand.

Can't believe I just woke up. At 5pm.

I listen to a lot of music. A lot. So much so, that I don't really know what I listen to anymore. Do I actually like the music that I listen too? It feels like I don't really have favourite song, or a favourite band. The songs all sound the same to me now. I think I have to change the way I listen to my music.

After thinking, these are my current favourite bands:

Arch Enemy

New Found Glory

Parkway Drive

Soilwork

Solution .45

I Killed The Prom Queen

August Burns Red

Underoath

Unearth

Billy Talent

As I Lay Dying
Killswitch Engage

Weezer

Sum 41

Trivium

Switchfoot

Relient K

At least I managed to come up with the list.

Assam curry (or curries in general and saucy/gravy-ish food) taste better after a night in the fridge.

Everybody knows that.

My textbook says: "Diversification is like sex: its attractions are obvious, often irresistible. Yet, the experience is often disappointing."

I feel like a zombie. Need sleep. Arggh. And brains.

Something's really wrong with me. I hate talking on the phone, especially to strangers. I usually choke up. that's why I usually plan out what i want to say. Weird eh? Like today I called this place and they told me they don't do delivery to the general public and I asked if they would do it for a fee, and the lady didn't get me. Took me like 2-3 tries, rephrasing my sentence before she got it. And half the time, I could hear what she was saying too. Why can't they make voice communication better, clearer, more effective? So yeah, talking over the phone isn't exactly my favourite thing to do. But actually I just think it's only in Australia. I feel like they'll judge me over the phone.

Imagine this. Heard of the Advanced Medical Institute (AMI)? It's the ad on TV about ED, the one where they play the piano. Well imagine what those people who work as telemarketers for their hotlines, wonder what they could be talking about once the phones are put down. Or what goes through their mind when they're talking with the patients.

*Halfway in the conversation*

AMI telemarketer: "So can you describe your situation, sir?"

You: "I can't satisfy my partner. I can only last for 1 minute in bed."

AMI telemarketer: "What the f***? Hahahahaha a 13 year old pre pubescent kid could do better than you. You should just kill yourself! Do your girlfriend a favour and buy her a dildo or something! Hahahaha ROFL"

You: *puts gun in mouth and blows brains out* BAMM

AMI telemarketer: "What was that loud noise, sir? Hello? Hello? Anybody there? Damn that SOB had the nerve to put down the phone on me." *continues doing nails*

Ok that was a little crude, and not funny at all. My attempt at Chris Rock dirty humor failed.

And I feel this innate need to speak with an accent with white people, and the worst part is that I can't do it right. Sometimes I annoy myself so bad. And that's bad, because I have very little tolerance for people who annoy me. Gahh. What's wrong with me?

why am i awake?

need more red bull.

Feel like I've got heartburn. Was it the awesome fried chicken I cooked yesterday with the awesome Korean chilli thing, or was it the Jager the day before, or it the BEEF burrito today?

Hmm.

When Five Fell = Wong Fu Goodness.
From Youtube:
We delight in the promise of falling for love.
We crumble in the dread of falling from love.
Everyone falls. Everything falls.

Director's Notes and Commentary here: :)

It's quite smart, how they've used these 5 items to each represent some facet of love. The emotions are honest, the characters real. Worth your 10 minutes.

Due to popular (actually just 2) demand,


GAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

1 May 2010

What a long day.

9.30am-1.30pm BS Prep
3.45pm-6.00pm Iron Man 2
8.00pm-11.00pm Deep Purple.

Phewww.

Pics will be up soon, hopefully? lol

I went for a hair cut.

I SOOOOOOOO regret it right now.

Mormons vs Christians

Now, the title might suggest some Christian hostility towards Mormons, and I'd like to clarify that my views as a Christian do not represent the Christian community as a whole. Heck, there are many things that we Christians can't agree on as a collective. Talk about unity.

Anyway.

Now there's this 2 Mormon dudes (missionaries?) who I constantly see around campus. When I see them, I just don't like it. It's not like I hate them, but I think that the message that they are sharing and telling others is wrong and deceitful. To me as a Christian, they're only leading people down a dark road of death and destruction, and in the name of Jesus (and Joseph Smith?).

But when I think about it, wouldn't that be what they'd think I'm doing? Wouldn't that be the same thing people think about when they see me doing the same, spreading what I perceive as the truth? Wouldn't it be the case that others would think I'm trying to pervert the truth and drag people down with me into hell?

I guess what I'm trying to say is, I guess I shouldn't see em Mormons as bad people. Just misguided people.

But it's hard, the Mormons seem so shady to me.

And I still sincerely hope that the girl doesn't become a Mormon this Saturday. Because being a mormon means wearing magic underpants.

ps: I don't hate Mormons. I just don't think the Book of Mormon should be taken seriously. But I realise that I have not much say as I have not read the book myself.

The chill is here.

I suspect the American Automobile Giants are the cause of the Toyota recalls.

Friday (actually it's Sunday) Tunes: Happy Beats

Motion City Soundtrack - Everything Is Alright

You know when you're really alright, but people ask you if you're okay? And you reassure them that everything is alright, but in your heart everything is far from alright? But you know that everything will be alright?

I am aware of the fact that I don't like a lot of people. People who have done nothing or given me no reason to dislike them. People who I don't even know or don't talk to. People who don't know I don't like them.

I dislike them most of the time just cause I do. I can't stand the way they talk, the way they walk, the way the look, the way they act, the way they think. It's just that they annoy me and I don't want to be associated with them. Also people that are arrogant piss the hell out off me. I hate smug assholes, especially the jock or preppy people.

You could be one of them.

Actually I think I know most of my blog readers, and not one of you fall in that category.

Why am I posting this? I don't know, just cause I can.

Apparently I'm emo. So when a friend said that she wanted to dress full on emo for a day, and asked so how to dress emo, I felt that being emo was something that I would be an authority in. But then it suddenly hit me, how do you dress emo? Is it black clothes, black shoes, black hair, black eyeliner? Wouldn't that make it goth? What's the difference between emo and goth? Is emo a fashion statement? Is it how you dress? Or is it the music you listen to? Or is it just your view of life?

I can't be bothered to think what the word 'emo' actually means. All I know is that it's one of those words that is multifaceted. And it's not something that is definite. It's subjective to the user, context and application.

Feeling emo?

MIA until Monday.

Tired.

I think the ball was on my side of the court for too long the ball and bounced twice. I suck at tennis.

Alice in Wonderland was weak. And watching with 3D glasses makes everything look brown. I can't imagine 3D television will catch on. But I'm wrong most of the time.

Watching the Barclays ad on Bloomberg, I realise that watching football without commentary is so different. Something feels missing. But I guess that's what it would feel like if you're actually watching from the stands.

Bah Kut Teh

Cooked Bah Kut Teh. Color wasn't as dark as I made the to look like, but tastewise it wasn't too bad. Not herby enough though.

I'm really craving some ss14 BKT goodness. Good times.

Rain 2 nights in a row. Finally it's cooling down.

Friday Tunes: Hadouken - M.A.D.

Friday tuneage sees a comeback. I guess that's so that my blog will be updated more regularly.


Random crap from Youtube.
Music: Hadouken - M.A.D.

It's not really my usual genre of music to listen to. Quite refreshing. Check em out.
Myspace

I really hate textbooks with glossy paper. It's so hard to read. Reflects light. And the paper goes weird if your fingers hold the page too long. Especially if your fingers are slighty wet or sweaty.

There are a lot of South Korean cults eh?
I was at one of their events a year ago. To think that they could have brainwashed me. *shivers*

Cheating on my Seiko?

Today wasn't the greatest of days. Why oh why did you have to drop and break on me. At least my faithful watch of 8 years still works, all it needs is a glass replacement.

I broke off the remaining glass so it can now be used, but I must remember not to touch the hands. So I'm not watchless now. I wouldn't mind cheating on my Seiko with a Omega Speedmaster though.

Extended family is bull. Some are nice. Some are just unbearable. You know who you are.

Love vs Obsession

*Warning. Metal Content. Heads up.*


Where do you draw the line? Where does the line between love and obsession stand? How does you loving someone not equate to being obsessed with someone.

I think it's simple. If you love the person and the person loves you too, then it's love. If you love the person and the person doesn't love you but you still continue to love the person, it's an obsession. Or more like it's if the love is mutual, then being obsessed is ok. But if the love is not, then being obsessed is not ok. But who am I to know?

---

Killswitch Engage - My Obsession
She's my addiction, withdrawals never end
The needle in my vein that I need to live
Her voice is compulsion when I call her name
Now I am burning inside an undying flame
Beautiful sleeper, know that I am watching
You can't escape me, we're bound by attraction

You will always be mine until my dying breath
Possessing my soul, you're my obsession

I can still see your eyes like burning stars
Even in your dreams we can't be torn apart

You will always be mine until my dying breath
Possessing my soul, you're my obsession
When I'm without you, I'm dying a slow death
Possessing my soul, you're my obsession

Wherever you are, I will follow
Now you know true love

Don't be afraid
We cannot be torn apart
Don't be afraid
I know I can change your heart

7daysofdrowning

Out Of Control.

Story of my life. It feels like I don't know what I'm doing.

Australia's not that bad, from the mouth of a Malaysian

If you know me, you'd know that I seem to always complain about Australia and how I'd rather be in Malaysia, and trust me, I'm aware that in the process I'm annoying you. Not everyone would have the opportunity to study abroad, and I'm not being some spoilt unappreciative undeserving brat here who doesn't know how good he's got it here. There are actually things that I do like about Australia. Let me share them with you.

1. Toilet Paper
Australian toilet paper is like heavenly. It's soft to the touch, pampering your behind, and tough, doesn't tear easily. But it cost like a lot. A LOT! I remember watching on some TV show that toilet paper is one of most inflated product, ever.

2. Supermarkets
I think Australian supermarkets are nice. They have a wide range of products, cheeses, fresh foods, biscuits and such. Took down a recipe from TV? All you'd need to do now is pop into Coles or Woolworths and you'd be able to get all the ingredients you need. Well not all the time, but most of the time I reckon.

3. Produce.
There's a reason why Australian Customs are such uptight a-holes. Produce here is very fresh. Fruits, veges. Nice colour, nice texture. You'd be able to enjoy a lot of fruits that we'd have to pay lots for back home at a fraction of the price. It's still a little pricey, but I guess it's okay once in a while. But of course, you won't find your rambutans and mangosteens here. You might, but have to pay ridiculous prices, and you probably won't be able to enjoy them as coughing up that dough might leave a bad taste in your mouth.

4. Seafood
Hands down, definitely beat Malaysia, in terms of size and freshness. Expensive though, especially if you convert. Salmon, Snow Crab, Lobster, Oyster, Abalone, Prawns etc. Sure, no one will be able to cook you a nice plate of Chilli Crab here, but even steaming it is good enough, so I'm not complaining.

5. Alcohol
Need I say? Hunter Valley. Wines. Cheap. I don't drink wine though. It's also pretty easy to get alcohol here, and that's a plus. Affordable when on sale. And there's the fact that certain states in Malaysia (you know who you are) don't permit the sale of alcohol.

6. Cars and Roads
It's cheaper to get cars here as compared to Malaysia. Getting your license, now that's the harder part. But it's not that bad I reckon. Road condition's a little better than Malaysia, though some roads really need more work in Sydney. And roads jam up here too.

7. Entertainment
More options here. You can go for shows, concerts, gigs, plays, whatever. Just look in the Herald and you'd know. We won't get as many cool gigs in Malaysia, because of PAS? lol.

8. I'm sure there's more. So Malaysians in Australia, have your say. Comment. Please?

Well this sucks.

Dang. Can't believe I'm back in Canberra.

At least there's unlimited internet.

Happy Chinese Lunar New Year.

Happy Valentines Day.

Yesterday, I reached Australia. Today, I sent a friend home. Sydney International Airport, I see you too often.

God, you told me not to worry. I think you're right. Thanks.

My days are so limited now. The thought of going back to Canberra leaves me with mixed feelings. It means being away from family and close friends (though I do have friends in Canberra too). And there's also...

However I do look forward to the year ahead. With studies and CIF and OCF, I can't help but feel optimistic. I am really excited to know what God has planned for this year. I just hope I'd be ready to move alongside.

OK enough Christian-y monologues.

Hoping to live a distraction-free final year in Canberra. Then we'll see where we go from there...

Living in the moment, appreciating every minute.

Leaving church, Mono's Silent Flight, Sleeping Dawn played on the radio. I pictured a scene, in the frame there's the man behind the wheel, and it's fixed on him from the perspective of someone looking standing in front of the car as he's driving on. The frames of this scene are a bit accelerated, like someone's fast forwarding a tape, but not that fast. He's crying as he drives. In the end, he dies. I can't decide between either him crashing or driving into the sea.

I must say, I've been feeling very restless and frustrated of late. Aggression and sorrow is being pent up. I get more agitated and have the tendency to curse under my breath as I am constantly reminded day after day the reality of it all. I really wanted to beat someone up today, and in church to boot. God help me (or him, if I do suddenly snap and go Hulk on the douche.)

I'm aware that this post probably doesn't benefit me in anyway, and probably will lead the people around me to not think of me as well as I'd hope they would.

!@#$%^&