Thursday, April 27, 2006

Proof of the level of boredom of Joshua Lim at 23.16.10pm on 27 April 2006.

Have you ever thought you wanna kill someone? Well today is your lucky day. Since Joshua is bored to bits, he'll kill anyone for you. At a fee of course. But Joshua is bored so he'll do it at a discounted price. From now to then, you will be able to enjoy discounts of up to 99.99%. And that's not all, if you are our first customer every hour, you will also get your second assasination free. Our offers are only for a limited time only.

Lalalala.......

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Nasi Lemak: Perfect Substitute For Cocaine?


After hearing York Kun doing a terrible rendition of Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You", I thought about drug-related deaths. WHY? Why do they do it? No they not that drug abuse only brings more pain. Is that high worth it?
I guess Whitney just got into the wrong company. Her husband Bobbie Brown smokes crack. Her In-Laws smoke crack. But then again that would be a really pathetic excuse don;t you think. What about her daughter? Immoral and irresponsible parents.


Many have died a shameful death due to their uncontrolled addiction. Let's list a few shall we?
1. John "Bonzo" Bonham from Led Zeppelin - Asphyxiation caused by choking on his own vomit
He was a drunkard who couldn't stop drinking. Drank 16 shots of vodka before death.
2. Marilyn Monroe - Overdose of sleeping pills
Had a Seven Year Itch for sedatives?
3. Eddie Guerrero - Heart failure due to prior drug abuse
Even after giving up drugs and alcohol, he stilled had to face the skeletons in his closet. At least he had a chance to redeem himself and he did. God bless him.
4. Jimi Hendrix - Respiratory arrest caused by barbiturate overdose
Hailed as one of the greatest guitarist in the history of mankind, this hippie was also the greatest idiot.
5. Elvis Presley - Heart attack caused by barbiturate overdose
Must have been the hair...

Not only do drug addicts end their lives with their addictions, they end other people's lives too.
Andrew Aycock, pilot with expired license by day, junkie by night
Aycock caused the death of guitar legend Randy Rhoads of Ozzy Ozbourne and hairdresser Rachel Youngblood by doing a divebomb with them in the backseat. The plane clipped a bus and cracjed into a house. Further investigation showed that his license was expired and he had cocaine in his system.

So kiddies, don't do drugs. Get high with the most high Jesus Christ and a packet of nasi lemak.

Sedap...